47 pages • 1 hour read
Dinaw MengestuA modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
Sepha remembers when he first came to America and lived with his uncle in his apartment. After two months, his uncle helped him get a job at the Capitol Hotel. His uncle performed for the bosses and called them “sir,” but when he was alone with Sepha, he cursed these same bosses. Sepha soon quit the hotel job and moved out of his uncle’s apartment. He got an apartment in Logan Circle and, at Kenneth’s insistence, opened his own convenience store. Kenneth and Joseph took part in the naming and opening of the store as well: “the opening of my store—‘our store,’ as we referred to it that night—was supposed to signal a departure from frustrating, underpaying jobs and unrealized ambitions” (144). Sepha reflects on Kenneth’s dreams of being his own boss and Joseph’s dreams of getting a PhD.
Sepha wonders what has become of the store that he left open and unattended earlier in the day. Five hours have passed since he walked out. He decides to use his uncle’s phone and calls the store, only to listen to who picks up, and then he hangs up before speaking. He goes back to the closet and takes out the lockbox with his uncle’s cash savings inside. He contemplates taking the money and running, but he does not.
The day after Sepha abruptly leaves Judith’s house back in December, he sleeps in until noon and completely ignores his duty to open the store. His neighbor Mrs. Davis comes to check on him, and he tells her he is sick. Secretly, he hopes Judith will come by so he can apologize, but he knows this is unlikely. When he returns to the store the next day, Naomi informs him that she waited for him for a long time the day before. Sepha thinks to himself, “There seemed to be no end to the disappointment I could cause” (151). Sepha and Naomi decorate the store with Christmas décor, and Sepha reads to her. He decides to write a note and send it home with Naomi for Judith. The note contains his apology for leaving abruptly the other night and explains that he wants to come by later in the evening to deliver some Christmas presents for them.
Sepha, now in a good mood, closes the store early so he can go shopping for the Christmas gifts for Judith, Naomi, and his mother and brother in Ethiopia. He remembers that Ethiopia celebrates Christmas a couple weeks after America, and he has found it harder and harder to remember to call his family on their Christmas Day. Sepha vows to do it right this year. He is newly energized because he has “the beginnings of a life” for the first time (154). After spending much time, effort, and money, Sepha returns to his neighborhood, only to find a note from Judith saying they left to visit family for the holidays. Sepha spends the evening wrapping the gifts thoughtfully and then gives one of them away to the prostitute he brings home from his walk.
On May 4, Sepha is still on the floor of his uncle’s apartment. After rereading his uncle’s personal letters and deciding not to take his savings, Sepha boards a bus and heads out to visit Joseph at the restaurant where he works. For Sepha, the buses are a testament to his “faith in man” (165). Sepha explains that busses are one of his favorite things: “I may marvel at the trains, but it’s the buses that have my heart” (165). He recalls memories of riding buses in Ethiopia with and without his father. After the revolution, the buses were repurposed for moving boy soldiers and prisoners. When Sepha lived with his uncle, he would ride the buses on his free time just to be with the crowds and not feel so alone.
Sepha arrives at the Colonial Grill where Joseph works and sees Joseph waiting tables inside. When Joseph notices him, he freezes and makes a facial expression that is closer to a grimace than a smile. Sepha thinks that Joseph never wanted his friends to visit him at work, so Sepha waves and walks home. As he walks, he thinks of how Washington, DC, is like Addis Ababa, the capital city of Ethiopia, but this is his home now. He thinks of his mother sending him away in the hours after his father’s death and how he can never return. But he realizes he can return to his store and his apartment 20 blocks away: “It would be so much easier never to return, wouldn’t it? To just keep walking down this road until I hit the city’s edge. And from there I could hop on a bus or train and make my way farther south, or north, and start all over again” (175).
Perhaps more than any other, this section communicates the depression and disconnection that Sepha has suffered since leaving Ethiopia. When Sepha remembers his arrival in America 17 years ago, his memories suggest that he was miserable, depressed, and suicidal for the first year he was in the country. He had left Ethiopia with no warning, no planning, and no time to say goodbye, completely uprooting his life and further deepening the trauma of his father’s death. Sepha mourns this loss without really understanding that he will never return. As his perspective returns to today, we find that his situation has not changed much: He is sitting on the floor, contemplating stealing his uncle’s savings to run away. Similar to his arrival in America, Sepha has lost everything: He has been evicted and lost his love interest. He thinks how easy it would be to just walk away from it all, just as he did before. But given his current circumstances, the reader understands that abandoning his life in the face of failure will only lead to more failure.
Sepha’s relationship with Judith inspires a sense of hope in him that is equal parts revitalizing and heartbreaking. By including a love story, Mengestu humanizes Sepha. While he is insulated by the trauma of his immigration and experience in America, caught between his past and his present, he is still ultimately human and therefore vulnerable to the powerful emotional forces such a position entails. Sepha painstakingly shops for thoughtful gifts and allows himself to imagine a life in which he is a better son and friend. For a moment, he sees himself connected to Judith and Naomi, and he even feels connected to his family in Ethiopia. Bi-culturalism and the idea of a double narrative seem possible. Unfortunately, it is not a reality he can sustain. His hopes are dashed, and he completely abandons his new commitments. When he invites a prostitute back to his apartment and lets her take whatever gift she wants, he signals his complete resignation to the loneliness and isolation he feels. Whether he tries or doesn’t, accepts his fate or attempts to change it, Sepha faces the same consequences; agency is an illusion.
The intangibility of success is also evident in the narratives of Sepha’s friends, although they continue to strive for it. This section provides insight into Joseph and his American dream of being a poet who can properly represent the honor and history of the Congo in a single epic poem. Joseph clings to romanticized notions of his homeland while dressing in a tuxedo and playing the role of Black servant to wealthy white people dining at the Colonial Grill. Joseph can compartmentalize this role so long as Sepha and Kenneth never enter his working world. When he sees Sepha outside the window of the restaurant, he experiences a moment of cognitive dissonance before returning to his role.
Throughout Sepha’s experiences, there is a sense of homelessness. Sepha reflects on how he cannot remember the single moment when he realized he would never return to Ethiopia, and he continues to search his memory looking for clues. At the same time, he contemplates whether he should bother returning to his actual “home” in Logan Circle. Alternatively, he also considers going somewhere new, anywhere that might provide Sepha with a true home. In buses Sepha presents a symbol of his desire to arrive at a place where he is accepted. He explains his love for buses because they make him feel safe and give him a temporary and fleeting connection with humanity. Buses also allow him a literal window to the world and validate his existence of feeling like he lives between worlds. He is a member of civilization, but he feels completely detached from it. On a bus, he can be surrounded by people and retain his anonymity. He can watch people come and go, see the neighborhoods where they live, and never have to engage or connect with anyone.
As alone and out of place as Sepha feels, he is still supported and cared for, though this reality feels far from Sepha’s own perception. His friends are steadfast and supportive; his father surrendered his life for Sepha’s; his mother gave up her valuable possessions for the safety of her son. Sepha even paints a picture of his uncle’s character as kind and loyal kin who would not have judged him for taking the money. With these more subtle characterizations framing Sepha’s life, readers can see that his position is one of his own making and a product of his depression.
By Dinaw Mengestu